Home Family The Times….They are a’ Changing.

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“I’ve never felt more ill-equipped in parenting,” I told my husband.

I had been struggling with some cognitive dissonance and was finally able to put my finger on it.

After 10 some years, we are completely out of the toddler stage.

Growing up, I wasn’t certain I even wanted kids {or marriage for that matter}. I had been intuitively programmed to believe that kids were an obligation; a distraction. I didn’t realize the joy that could come from marriage and parenting. {I joked with a few ladies the other day that I stayed as far away from any Home Economics classes as I could in school.}

I’m truly glad life had other plans.

What I didn’t count on is how much I would LOVE being a mom or how much I would LOVE babies.

After the late-term loss of our last child about a year ago, we decided it was time to close that door. Still deeply grieving our child, yet also profoundly thankful for the children we get to raise here.

After years of babies, nursing, diapers and potty training, we are approaching a new stage of life. One which I know is beautiful and wonderful, but one that feels foreign.

All big kids – no babies.

Though don’t get me wrong, I still vividly remember the survival mode of having 4 small children in 5 years. Survival mode was difficult, tedious and hard. But difficult, tedious and hard was familiar.

So now we are in the throws of this uncharted territory.

know we would have hit this stage eventually. I just wasn’t ready for it, or rather it feels as if I just woke up and we were there.

We are here.

This shift and change.

“We’ll get through it,” my husband said.

And I know we will. And I know there will be tremendous joy and struggle ahead.

I need to remind myself that it’s OK to tell my kids that I have no idea what I’m doing.

But we’ll get through it…..together.

Until the next season of change.

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Edited to add: We recently became licensed to be Foster Parents and look forward to the influx of both babes and kiddos.

Wife, mother of six, city girl turned farm girl, in process.
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7 replies to this post
  1. The newborn/toddler stage is so fun. It seems to be what most people think about when they think about having children. I love the independence of my older children but I know I will be sad closing the infant/toddler chapter in a few year.

  2. That is truth. Blindly headed in the same direction, Lady. Lots of prayer and lots of apologies too, I’m sure.

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